Errrrr...

 Expecting Sedge fans recalled from their journey down the M6 to come steaming back to Grove Park for more glory instead; local law enforcement begin surveillance

 Which is countered by Radio Dreckly's own Special Pursuit Vehicle. Bwian's behaviour though looks suspect as he appears to be wiping fingerprints off what appears to be a shooter

 Arriving Pirates fans, whilst ignoring Ferg to the left of the shot after the Otley  Canine Scandal, amble towards the clubhouse oblivious that they are in fact walking into a trap...

 A shot rings out and gallantly Swampy takes the .38 special like a man

 News reaches the intrepid Dreckly Reporter mid interview with Jan van der Oodleboodle as they show great concern. The Tribble makes no comment

 Bet Lynch takes it all in her stride as a normal occurance in the rough tough streets of South Manchester surburbia; rushed off her feet as she is in the lunch time happy hour

 However the World of News waits for no-one as Midland Exile Celebrity, Woodhouse Pirate signs autographs for admiring fans

 Which cuts no mustard with Newlyn Steak Club Mafia in Manchester on a recruitment drive for new members.

 The groupies waiting outside couldn't careless about such matters as they patiently brave the cold in the slim hope of seeing their idol

 Agent Mags though is shocked at the bar bill the 'Star' has run up

 Bored with waiting, the Groupies switch allegiances in this fickle world we now live in...

 ...as Janner ups the stakes with his drum; 'borrowed from some kid next door'.

 The local crew though have come prepared and a drum stand off begins

 Dick Dreckly cannot contain his emotion at such a prime spot for his plane spotting hobby. OPS looks on with a world weary look which falls short in hiding a gruesome secret

 DC meanwhile upsets the Groupies who turn their attentions to those occupying the aptly named Pacemakers Stand

 But their short attention span which has been on show since the off, soon shifts once more

 Sam and Bertie rush to Rhodders' aid as some big bloke refuses to give him his ball back

 Rhys is now 'Mad For It'

 Half time approaches and some makeshift pens are put up just in case any stray rugby players need rounding up ready for market

 While local gravediggers prepare for any 'eventuality'

 Travelling Pirate fans pray for forgiveness although one suspects Woodhouse may be treating this only as a photo oportunity to further his career

 Then the local guide shows up; late, worse for wear and definitely lowering the tone. A pint for every penalty the ref has awarded is certainly beginning to tell

 Bertrand meanwhile isn't afraid to mix with some homeboy hoodlums

 Stevie senses his chance to impress the Newlyn Steak Club

 The chaps looking all sheepish head for the pens

 But not before Rob tries to cadge a swig

 And Stevie gets the bad news from Harbourview that "Nearly scoring a try isn't good enough to renew his NSC membership" . Devs senior in the background gives free reign to Junior to do what ever he wishes with that long stick.

 The trial begins as guest Lord Chief Justice, Alf 'OPS Garnett presides, with an unprepared DD caught mid interview with a half finished glass of beer. Mark's suggestion that Bolton will thump the 'Ammers tomorrow doesn't go down too well either

 Upon hearing new evidence from Brett, LCJ Alf relocates the hearing to the clubhouse where rumours abound as to the identity and whereabouts of Who Shot Swampy

 Nicky talks openly causing one onlooker to nearly choke on his beer

 Word reaches the Manchester locker room who send out a representitive...and then lock him out by way of amusing female onlokers

 Newly married Rhoddri displays his new found respectability by looking the other way

 Rhys shows no such inhibition and laughs like a drain

 Press Gang members close ranks and a commandeered flag is used as a makeshift sheet to shield the suspect

 Inside the Dreckly SPV, Bwian awaits his charge

 Who...with visual evidence of having been 'interviewed' by Gene Hunt, is driven quickly away to a nearby Police Station for questioning

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